May 25

What Makes Our Marriage Work – Communication

Communicating If you and your significant other have ever tried to do any type of home improvement project where teamwork was a crucial part of the process then you know how important communication is.  Karen and I have found, sometimes the hard way, just how important the words we use are.  Sometimes I am thinking one thing and she is thinking another then all of a sudden we expect to read each other’s mind.  Nine times out of ten when we do that one of us usually gets ‘the look’ followed up by the saying “use your words.”

I remember the first time that I was given the look by Karen, and naturally it was my own fault.  It happened during one of our first projects on the house together.  When Karen and I first started dating she asked me to house sit while she was being a sponsor at a church retreat, and for whatever reason I took it upon myself to remove some of the old wallpaper from her living room.  Karen had not asked me to do it, but in a house that had no internet, cable, or for that matter a working television there was not a whole lot to do.  So, in my defense I thought I was doing her a favor.  When she got back from her retreat and saw that I had removed the metallic blue wallpaper from her living room she gave me the look.  Not that she was mad that I had done it, but that I had not asked her if she wanted me to do it.

At least that episode taught me a valuable lesson which is the power of communication, it goes a long way to keep the looks at bay.  Of course, today when I work on something in the house without being told I get a totally different reaction, but communication, if it is working on a project or just talking things through on how we decide to do it, goes a long way.  Are we perfect at it, heck no, but like all aspects in a healthy marriage it is a work in process.  I wish I could say that we never have to say “use your words” to each other but at least we can laugh about it once the lines of communication open back up.

Image via http://marriagelifeministries.org/wpcontent/uploads/2012/03/stickfigurescommunicating.jpg

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  1. freda

    How funny, I know that look. lol

    1. Kenny and Karen

      I do my best not to get the look very often!

      1. freda

        Kenny you probably never get that look. It is designed for mothers.

        1. Kenny and Karen

          Yeah… like husbands never get the look.

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